confusion/backed up research

I'm having a really difficult time. My mind is overflowing with ideas, but none of them translate, none of them connect and none of them mean anything beyond sudden little splurges of emotional imagery.

When I try to work I have these delusions of grandeur as to what my painting will look like, but my impatience makes me rush and the result is never satisfying. It's a cycle I seem to have fallen into that's extremely hard to get out of. It's dysfunction at its best and that is very frustrating.

I've been doing a fairly diligent job of keeping track of artists in my sketchbook, but for some reason have been procrastinating translating them onto the blog (therefore I apologize in advance for the sudden rash of posts).

1)

Review of "playing fields" lecture

I found Ryan Schneider's work to be very aesthetically exciting and interesting. The colors were fantastic; I was amazed how pure and vibrant they were despite clearly being mixed values. Compositionally he took a lot of risks, lots of sharp angles and repetition of shapes; everything, including his figures and interiors were completely jagged and vicious, very confrontational.

I was particularly drawn to "Snowed Out/Snowed In" (shown above), probably because of its ambiguity, while I felt that a lot of his other paintings were too clearly personal for an audience to relate to. There was a kind of mysterious dysfunction to everything he painted (with the exception of "Snowed Out/Snowed In") that I found intriguing until he started talking more about his processes and inspiration. To be honest I found much of what he said to be very superficial and quite disappointing given how peculiar his paintings were.

He spoke a lot about drinking and partying with his friends, being hung over, and fighting with his girlfriend as the majority of his inspiration, and while I'm sure most people can relate to these things from time to time in their lives, it was very disappointing to me that he chose to focus on these dysfunctional habits as the basis for his creative process, as though highlighting them and telling his viewers "this is all I am." It might seem a bit harsh, but the general impression I got from Mr. Schneider was that his life consisted mainly of partying. After that it was hard for me to take his work seriously because I felt as though he was giving an awful lot of meaning and symbolism to something that he probably should have outgrown when he was done with college.

What I learned from this is that it's better for me to know little to nothing about an artist's intentions when viewing their art, because if I am not satisfied with them it makes it hard for me to continue to appreciate what they have produced.